Constellations, Confrontations, and a Confession
by Aranel Saerwen
Summary: Vignette on trust and how if affects Max and Alec's relationship - whether that is for the better or worse, you'll just have to read. Disclaimer forgot to put in story : I don't own Dark Angel - Though i wish I owned Alec


AN: Hello DA fans, here is a fic for ya'll - hopefully not the last - and it's for all us MaxAlec shippers. It is not based on a scene of the Dark Angel series, not nearly enough structure for that, it is simply a vignette on trust and how it affects Max and Alec's relationship - whether that is for the best of worst...you'll just have to read and find out.

Reviews are most appreciated - of course :) And I really hope you enjoy...

**Constellations, a Confrontation, and a Confession**

By Aranel du Lac

Outside Seattle, in Logan Cale's alienated cabin, Alec, transgenic X-494, leaned against a window, simply looking outside. Lydecker was combing through Seattle looking for transgenics, so Logan had insisted that his X5, X4, and dog-man friends hide here until the Manticore agent moved on. _Mr. 'Save-the-day'_, Alec had thought irritably to himself when he learned he'd have to leave his comfortable apartment and its easy access to the bars and women of Seattle.

However on arrival, his feelings towards the trip had changed. Here the setting was green and full of life, a huge difference from the poverty stricken, rainy, and gray world that was their home, and they were free to do what they would.

Joshua spent his days rambling in the woods, returning only to paint the natural wonders he'd seen down in the basement, where he'd fall asleep each night; paintbrush in hand - or paw. And even Max had taken to disappearing for a good part of the day; never saying a word about where she went or what she did, _in true Max fashion_. This left Alec to his own ramblings and thoughts – something that had not been such a good thing since he had been feeling rather…odd, as of late. His thoughts were roaming and generally unsettling – especially those concerning Max and their strained 'relationship', _If that's what one called our uneasy coexistence_?

So, finally, out of frustrated/bored curiosity, Alec had followed Max that morning to find that she had been going to the lake to swim. He'd watched with rapt attention as she glided through the water with the same grace, agility, and strength that she did everything with. _Too bad she had to wear clothes_, Alec thought wickedly to himself as he followed her lithe figure as it sliced through the water. Finally, feeling a little bit too much like a peeping-Tom, he'd left her there undisturbed.

Now she was standing in the shadows of a large evergreen, just looking up at the patch of sky that was visible in the clearing that the cabin sat in. Seeing her, Alec stirred himself from his thoughts, stretching his arms and lean torso, before going outside into the cool evening.

He strode up to stand behind her; purposefully invading her private space – something that always irritated a transgenic, _especially_ this one – and followed her gaze as she looked up at the stars.

"Never pictured you as the stargazing type, Max." he quipped. Her expression didn't change and Alec frowned slightly at himself in disappointment; obviously he was suffering withdrawal symptoms from missing their daily tongue lashing bouts.

Looking back at the sky he said,

"You like the stars." It was an observation, not a question, although he did hope she might supply the reason.

The corner of her mouth slightly turned up and she did oblige him – though not purposefully of course – with an answer,

"They're comforting I guess." Her voice was hushed in the night.

Alec's brow wrinkled with further confusion; _orbs of burning gas millions of miles away – comforting_?

"How you figure that?" he cocked his head, as if that would help him see what Max apparently was seeing.

"Well..." she shrugged slightly, "They never change. The rising of the sun in the morning, when it sets at night and then the moon and the stars come out...it's something that Manticore, the government, the depression...nobody can mess with." her voice betrayed a deep sense of emotion.

Alec looked at her; wondering at yet another facet of the 'indomitable Max.'

"I never thought about it." he said. Max could have easily said something smart: Alec had given her the ammo, but she simply looked at him and smiled an amused smile, then looked back up.

As the two stood there, in that sort of reverential silence, Alec felt an odd stirring inside him, he felt like he was seeing the real Max; unguarded, at peace, happy even. He wondered at the sensation of pleasure it caused. It was then Max took a step backwards and, not watching where she was going, nearly tripped over an exposed tree root. Alec reached out to help steady her but she caught herself, and Alec marked how she moved away from him; refusing the skin of his fingers; _any _of his help. His pleasant feeling was replaced with anger.

"Why do you do that?" he said in an exasperated breath.

Max looked at him as if he was crazy; brows drawn together and her mouth scowling,

"Do what?"

"Push everyone away, even when they try to help?" He accused. He wasn't only thinking of this minute incident, he was thinking of the other countless times that Max hadn't accepted help from him – from anyone. She kept everyone locked out, and kept her locked in; always suspicious and wary.

"What? I'm wrong to be strong and independent!" She was pissed now, a hand on her hip, but Alec wasn't deterred; _it's not anything new is it?_

"That's not a sign of strength and independence, Max; a strong and independentperson knows how to accept help from others. They know how to trust people."

Max's voice was irate, but Alec also heard the strained tone belying it,

"Trust? Trust! Let me tell you what happens when you trust people, Alec; they drop you."

She said matter-of-factly.

"Yeah, but they help you up again." Alec cut in fervently. _When did I start believing that?_ But he ignored the question; somehow he cared for more than just proving he was right by winning this argument.

"Then they drop you again, they can't help it." Max countered, "Nobody can help it, sooner or later everybody's hurt." her voice caught as she finished and she looked away.

Alec thought about the experiences that Max had had to develop this opinion, and he thought about his own experiences of being 'dropped'; he continued in a softer tone,

"So, you're afraid."

Max's tone wasn't any softer, it just had a sarcastic edge now,

"And you're not? Mr. '_Everything's all good'_. You never show or tell anybody your real feelings." Alec felt Max's words hit hard,

"Sure I do." He defended. Max rolled her eyes and Alec could practically hear her say '_liar_' in her mind – just like he was in his.

"Fine – You want me to tell you how I feel?" he asked,

"Yeah!" Max nodded her head emphatically, extending her arms in a 'finally!' gesture.

Alec stepped closer to her as he spoke.

"Alright, I'll tell you how I feel," The intensity of Alec's eyes caused Max to question herself as he looked down at her, his green eyes piercing her brown ones.

"Max," his voice was full of gruff, raw, emotion, sending an involuntary shiver up Max's spine,

"I don't know what it is about you - cause your the most stubborn, sarcastic, save-the-world...bitch! that I have ever met - and yet..." he was desperate for the words that suddenly were so clear in his head and in his transgenic heart that they were unutterable, "I -" he paused and looked away for a millisecond, gathering his thoughts,

"Yet there are also times when you're the softest, gentlest, most caring and, beautiful woman…the times when you think no one is looking...but I am. I see you Max, I feel you...and I find more and more, that I want to see you, I wanna feel what you're feeling, and I want to protect you from anything that would cause you harm…" he shook his head slightly in his own disbelief, and met her eyes once more,

"I'm in love with you Max."

He let out a pent up breath, relieved of his burden; a burden whose weight he'd felt but whose cause he hadn't understood until all the pieces had come crashing together. _And all cause Max had a thing for stars_. But another burden replaced it. He looked to Max, hoping his eyes weren't as desperate as he felt.

Max looked confused, holy god she looked afraid – _That'd be the eighth wonder of the world – _

"But, you can't protect me, Alec, and _I _can't protect _you_."

Alec took her by the arms, wanting her to believe what was the very fiber of his being,

"But I would always try, and if I dropped you I'd always pick you up, I'd always run to you, Max - Max please...trust me."

Max looked up at Alec with doubt still in her eyes and a rebuttal on her tongue and it was the undoing of Alec.

He grabbed her, pulling her up against him, crushing her mouth with his. He heard her humanly inaudible moan of surprise and pleasure, but could feel a tear fall over his fingers, as he tried to convey how deeply he cared. Wiping away her tear with his thumb, he broke the kiss and looked into her eyes again, doubt was still there._ Damn that hurts_. Another tear fell, he wiped it away too,

"Max," his voice was raw with emotion, "please-" he bit back another plea, he wasn't a beggar.

"At least say something."

Max bit her lip, how could she tell him how much she wanted to love him, how she wanted to trust him; to trust somebody – but that she couldn't. She couldn't risk it. Not ever again.

"I can't Alec." her voice was barely a whisper.

Alec surprised her with his next action. When she expected him to turn away, or say something harsh, to basically be the immature Alec she knew so well, he just gathered her into his arms, tenderly, cradling her like a child. No crude or lewd jokes, no passes, just a comforting hug. Max let a few more tears of disappointment, fear, and even anger – at herself - fall as she listened to his pounding heart, then to his hoarse voice as he said,

"But you can."

**The End**


End file.
